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Sunday, November 29, 2009

Ella is 20 Months Old Today


We love this little girl so much!! I can't believe that another month has already passed by. Ella still seems to be feeling good. I think both daddy and I are on high alert worrying about every little thing she does. "Is she still pink?", "How has her energy been today?", "Is she moving around and getting into everything?" For now, the answers to all of these questions are "yes!" We had some pictures done of my kids and their cousin two days before she went into the hospital and I just picked them up last night. I was SHOCKED at how pale she was in the photos. I can't even tell you how guilty it makes me feel that it took me so long to figure out what was going on. I will try to scan one of the photos so you can see just how bad she looked....however, she was totally smiling in all of the pictures. What a trooper!!!
Tomorrow morning I will take her to our local lab and get her blood drawn again for the tenth time this week. Then on Tuesday, we will head to CHOC to get her bone marrow biopsy done. They want her blood counts done the day before so they have them the day of the procedure to make sure her hemoglobin and platelet counts are high enough to do the procedure. I pray they will be so that we can get some answers. We are definitely in "prepare for the worst and hope for the best" mode. Joe and I have started talking over the details of how we will work things out IF she is showing signs of leukemia and we have to start having long hospital stays. The hardest part to figure out is what to do with Abbey and Emma. Thankfully my mom and sister are in town so that should help. I know it seems as if we are being premature in our planning but we just don't want to get hit with everything at once. And the truth is that most of the doctors do feel that she will probably turn to leukemia eventually.
On a positive note, I think she is saying her first official word...."bye, bye". She has been saying something like Ma Ma and Da Da but it doesn't seem to necessarily be directed towards us all the time. But bye bye is always accompanied with a wave of the hand so on this one I am sure. Maybe someday I will be able to catch it on video.

13 comments:

Heather said...

Look at those beautiful pink cheeks!Thinking of you constantly and wanting you and Joe to know we are here for you for whatever,whenever.Prayers her numbers look good and you can go forward with the BM on Tuesday.I know you want answers,as limbo is a terrible place to be.Love to you all and kisses to sweet Ella.

Adam, Jaci, Grant, Grace and Amelia said...

Happy birthday, sweet girl! Don't beat yourself up about not noticing Ella as not feeling well. It happens to the best of us. Tonight, I pulled Gracie's g-tube out and while we sat in the ER waiting to make sure it was back in right, I felt like such a horrible mommy but then I realized I cannot beat myself up...so same to you! I hope everything will turn out okay. Keep us posted. And Ella, I just want to squeeze you and kiss you! You are so blasted cute!

Tina said...

I can imagine how worrying this must be, and preparing for the worst is so very brave but terribly terribly hard, oh my heart goes out to you. I pray her numbers look good and on Tuesday you can go ahead with the Bone marrow biopsy so you get some answers at last, nothing is worse than not knowing what is going on.
On a happier note, I love her picture....naturally!!! She is looking so big, and so sweet, I hope I always get to see that beautiful smile of hers. Great job on the bye-bye, hope you can capture it on video. Saira also says mama, papa, but not sure if its directed at us.

Unknown said...

She sure does look nice and pink. What a difference in these pic', compared to the pic of her just as you were getting ready to head to the ER. Of course we are pulling for good counts, so you can go forward with the bone marrow test.

Stephanie said...

I hate that you even have to think like this... preparing and such.
Wish we were closer to help.
But always sending our love and prayers!

Happy 20 months sweet pea!!!

Lacey said...

Oh I love those pink cheeks. Its ok to start planning. So if it does happen you are prepared. I wish we were there to help you, praying everything goes good tomorrow.

Mama Mason-Mann said...

Like you said, prepare for the worst, hope for the best! I don't think it's "premature" to start having contingency plans in place. If nothing else it may provide you with some peace of mind while you wait (and wait). Know we're all here waiting with you. Holding your vitural hand.

As ALWAYS - LOVE the pics! Happy 20 months sweet Ella!

Emily said...

Awww... what a darling little girl! Your family is always in our prayers. Happy 20 months! Holy cow... that means she is really close to being TWO! Time sure flies...

Heidi said...

Happy 20 months sweet Ella!! I'm glad she is feeling better. You are in my prayers. I will be praying hard on Tuesday that you are able to have the bone marrow biopsy done and that the results are good. I can't imagine trying to prepare for the worst and hope for the best so often. I wish I lived closer so that I could help!

Lori said...

I haven't been on blogland much the past couple of weeks and always feel bad when I miss big things going on. I am so glad to hear that Miss Ella is safely home from the hospital, and we will certainly be praying for good results from the biopsy tomorrow.
Hang in there! God has a plan that is perfect.
Happy 20 months Sweet Ella Grace!!

my family said...

It is hard to remember at difficult times God is in control but it is wonderful to know we can cling to him always. I will be praying for the best outcome. Happy 20th month sweet girl

Kele said...

Still praying!
Happy 20 months Ella!!

heidi marie said...

ella's color definitely looks better. her cheeks are nice and rosy. happy 20 months ella! praying for and thinking about you guys. i hope that you can get answers very soon!